{"id":169,"date":"2014-11-10T14:12:06","date_gmt":"2014-11-10T22:12:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/rjvancleave.com\/home\/?p=169"},"modified":"2014-11-28T21:45:09","modified_gmt":"2014-11-29T05:45:09","slug":"you-cant-please-all-of-the-people-all-of-the-time","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/rjvancleave.com\/home\/you-cant-please-all-of-the-people-all-of-the-time\/","title":{"rendered":"You can\u2019t please all of the people all of the time."},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201cYou can please some of the people all of the time, you can please all of the people some of the time, but you can\u2019t please all of the people all of the time<\/strong>.\u201d
\n\u2015\u00a0John Lydgate<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

As a fairly new writer to Contemporary Romance, I find that I have remind myself of this quote frequently. I have already felt the (mild) sting of a three star review for my first book, Demons<\/em>. However, it was a well written and honest review, and I was able to take some really good things away from it. The reviewer didn’t get why I had added so much drama, as she described it, into my book. I<\/em><\/strong>\u00a0got it, being that I was the writer, but since I am also a reader of my genre, I understand that readers read and process things differently. A scene that may be gripping or poignant to one, may make another reader stop and ask \u201cWhat the hell did I just<\/em> read?\u201d And you know what? That\u2019s OKAY. The world would be a very boring place if we all saw things in exactly the same way.<\/p>\n

Part of my personality is to be a \u2018people pleaser.’ As a child, I followed the rules set out by my parents, and by doing so, I made them happy. That philosophy, if I dare call it that, followed me into school. While I wasn’t considered the teacher\u2019s pet, by any means, I always felt the need to remain on the good side of my teachers – be it in grammar school or in college. As with my parents, I was devastated if I actually disappointed a teacher. Motherhood for me,\u00a0was natural continuation of that philosopy. Most mothers naturally strive to keep their children happy. It\u2019s the necessities \u2013 clean diapers, bottles, and so forth\u00a0that babies need. Then it moves into the nice<\/em>ities \u2013 an iPhone, a car, expensive clothes,\u00a0that we may lavish upon our\u00a0tweens and teens. Many times, mothers (and fathers, for that matter) will go without, in order to give their children things that\u00a0make them happy.<\/p>\n

In a sense, my writing is like giving birth\u2013 both my children and my books are creations that came from<\/em> me<\/em><\/strong>. As for my\u00a0books, I want my readers to be happy with what I produced. So far, Demons<\/em> has been well received. However, a week ago, I received my very first DNF \u2013 Did Not Finish. It was from a new beta reader that was willing to give my second book, Damages<\/em>, a shot. The beta sent my editor a note stating that she tried, but just couldn\u2019t finish the book. She stated that it was \u2018all over the place,\u2019 and even after getting half way through it, she just couldn\u2019t connect with my characters.<\/p>\n

I was totally crushed<\/em>. My writing was all over the place? There were no connections made? I wanted to cry and delete the entire manuscript \u2013 all 105,000 plus words that I\u2019d poured my heart and soul into for over five months. I felt that I had let someone down, and that did not sit well with me. I even found myself doubting my abilities as a writer. But<\/em>, then I remembered the quote above. I am not going to be able to please all the people all the time<\/em><\/strong>. If I can\u2019t keep that front and center in my brain, then I\u2019m going to fall apart with each and every\u00a0negative review my books receive \u2013 and I\u2019d be foolish to think that’s never\u00a0going to\u00a0happen.<\/p>\n

After I regrouped, I remembered that my other betas enjoyed the book. They thought the story flowed well, and were able to feel a connection with the characters in the way I had intended. Damages, <\/em>after all,<\/em> was a difficult book for me to write. It dealt with both the physical and sexual abuse that my main character, Mary Andrews, suffered as a child, and the fallout that followed. Unfortunately, that fallout was in the form of an abusive marriage. Not all readers will like the premise, nor will everyone like my writing style. For one beta, it hit a little too close to home. She actually had to step away from the story for a day\u00a0before resuming. That told me I was able to connect with at least one person.<\/p>\n

I did not write Damages<\/em> to be the dark, graphic novel that it could have been, but I do realize the topic can be a bit too much for some. Instead, I focused the story on Mary stumbling across that \u2018right someone\u2019 \u2013 in this case, Justin MacLane – who helped her\u00a0see that she was not the damaged woman she thought she was. Along her journey, Mary discovered that she was able to survive some pretty horrific things, and yet still get up and live each new day to its fullest. As for me, a negative review or even a DNF, aren’t the worst things that could happen. Perhaps, in this case, I could\u00a0really learn a thing, or\u00a0two, from Mary.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cYou can please some of the people all of the time, you can please all of the people some of the time, but you can\u2019t please all of the people all of the time.\u201d \u2015\u00a0John Lydgate As a fairly new writer to Contemporary Romance, I find that I have remind myself of this quote frequently. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-169","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4Y8Rp-2J","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/rjvancleave.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/169","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/rjvancleave.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/rjvancleave.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/rjvancleave.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/rjvancleave.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=169"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/rjvancleave.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/169\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":198,"href":"http:\/\/rjvancleave.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/169\/revisions\/198"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/rjvancleave.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=169"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/rjvancleave.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=169"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/rjvancleave.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=169"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}